As I sit here typing this it is 2:51 in the morning. I am seated at an extremely worn restaurant booth with minimal padding for my hind end. My iPad is tilted up onto an open novel on the table in front of me. Jackson is sprawled on the seat next to me belly-side down. Emma had woken up, but as hard as she tried was unable to get comfortable on my lap seated upright facing me next to jackson. Right outside my window, John is in our vehicle trying to get any decent sleep as his body is fighting off a cold of sorts and the booth seats just weren't cutting it. The lights are dim in this area of the gas station as the dining side has closed many hours ago. However, the noise of the ice machine and a clingy/vibrating noise rattle on incessantly behind me. Over five hours have passed now since our car had deemed itself unfit for interstate driving. Not being able to accelerate while driving uphill and toward the end maxing out at 30 mph just doesn't cut it while driving from Georgia back to Indiana. Our ride is on the way.
As I have battled over the last year with grief and all that which stems from burying your child (or any loved one, I'm sure), there are a grew things that the Lord has been teaching me. One extremely important lesson He has been teaching me is that of intentional thankfulness. I am learning that I must be mindful and intentional. I must choose joy. Joy in Him is rooted in thankfulness--for who He is, for what He has done, and what He has promised to do.
Here is my list of thankfulness for tonight (at least as best as I can recall):
We are all here together as a family.
A level-headed husband.
We made it off the interstate.
We made it to a substantial gas station.
The gas station has an area where the kids can sleep.
The gas station has wi-fi.
The gas station has air conditioning.
Enough quiet that I can enjoy a book.
Selfless friends willing to drive 5 hours to come pick us up and tow our vehicle.
A husband who legitimately helps with the kids.
That we were able to make a trip to Georgia as a healthy family.
We were not left stranded in the mountains somewhere.
Singing bible verses have memorized with Emma (deut 7:9; deut 10:12-13; psalm 86:5-7; John 1:12-13)
I'm sure there were more little things, but those are what come to mind as best as i can recall at now 3:15.